Metapost: Breaking Dawn Twitter Aftermath

I am back from Breaking Dawn! It was not as horrible as I expected! (Behold the power of Low Expectations!) And there will be a Very Serious Post in a couple of weeks that reviews the movie in depth! But for now we have Twitter feeds and exclamation points! But first!

Content Warning: Racism, Violence, and also I am going to describe the Very Horrible Pregnancy and the Awful Birth Scene. I will ROT13 that part so you can skip it if you want to. It's probably not as bad as the book, but that doesn't mean it's not bad at all. 

This was from the house. I'm glad I did test it, because my twitter client on my phone (Seesmic) took some prodding before it decided to work.

I love my Comics Curmudgeon shirt. It's soft, long-sleeved, totally comfortable, and comes in plus sizes. Later I realized I didn't need to be worried -- Josh has done MST3King with the actual MST3K guys, so I think he'd appreciate my Breaking Dawn experiment. And no one threw soda on me.

The next tweet after that was going to be something to the effect that a kernel nearly broke my tooth and the next tweet after that was going to be that someone needs to mathematically chart the correlation such that as hunger goes down, the likelihood of kernel-stuck-in-teeth goes up, and the whole thing reaches a point where the deliciousness of the popcorn is no longer a big enough draw to continue eating it, but my fingers were too buttery to tweet.

Brin correctly guessed that I got to the theater WAY too early. The whole thing went like this:

Step 1: Ana calls Mom to ask when she should leave because Ana doesn't do Thanksgiving traffic.
Step 2: Mom advises Ana to leave an hour early. Can't be too careful.
Step 3: Ana leaves an hour and ten minutes early. Can't be too careful.
Step 4: Ana arrives 45 minutes before movie starts. You CAN be too careful, apparently.
Step 5: Ana amuses herself with Twitter.

And here we are.

With no offense meant to Robert Pattinson, I had to wonder how awful all the other actors must have been for him to get the part. (Assuming it was actually a merit system, which is probably a big assumption.) I mean, I think he's really grown into the role, but the first movie seems so staring and stuttering and awkward. Did they really intend his performance to go that way? Did Robert finish each scene and cringe as someone said, "That was great, Robert, no really it was, but could you do it again with more awkwardness?"

Apparently he's in Mad Men. Which I haven't seen. So there's that.

Not to read too much into things, but... Oh, who am I kidding? Look, the point is, Disney, if you're going to have a bunch of cute characters swarming all over your cruise ship commercial, and if one of them is going to be in a servitude role, at least have it be the Shiny Happy Version of that character. Not the Dirty Sad Version. Do I have to explain to you why that makes me uncomfortable? I mean, I just finished re-reading "Nickel and Dimed", you can't tell me that you didn't have someone say "Shouldn't Wall-E be happy in his work while he serves towels to the luxuriating woman in the bathtub? Shouldn't he not look like his work is soul-crushing?"

Apparently they're showing Titanic in theaters again. Halfway through the preview, I felt like pointing out that they were showing spoilers. Then I realized that was kind of the point.

I cried. This moved me more than anything else in that theater.

Seriously. It's about energy-ball aliens who come to earth, eat all our electricity, and then eat us. Great premise, but you just know it'll have Twenty Minutes with Jerks. Just once I want a disaster movie where they don't even try to make you learn the characters' names and stereotypical personalities. WE DON'T CARE, HOLLYWOOD.

Ahahaha. I amuse me.

Seriously. Maybe they explain this in the book, or something, but it Just Bugs Me. Rosalie and Emmett throw a wedding every 5-10 years. Presumably Edward and Bella will do the same, at least if they want to. (Ahahahaha, no, seriously, it'll be if ALICE wants to. I have Very Serious Thoughts on that.) So why so much drama around this particular wedding? Will it really make that much of a difference if the log-seats aren't perfectly aligned?

It is, as Brin noted, his first scene. He breezes into Bella's bedroom and basically says, "Are you having cold feet? I mean, I'm not having cold feet. Not really, anyway. Well, a little. But you really SHOULD have cold feet. By the way, I never told you before, but I'm a murderer several times over. Well... goodbye." (Also, is this really a revelation? Because I remember already knowing this, and I thought it was mentioned in Twilight The First Book for goodness sake.)

Emmett and Jasper show up and act adorable. It occurs to me that Edward's appeal lies less in Edward and more in the Perfect Family that comes as part of the package. Also, Jasper continues to be cooler than anyone else in the film, because all his lines are nice, and he only speaks like eight times. Jasper is classy.

There's a very nice dream sequence where Bella sees blood spreading out from the altar, and her white dress and Edward's white tux are blood-stained. It's a really awesome, provocative scene... and it's then ruined by a pan out that shows her and Edward standing on a top of a pile of bodies, some of which are decapitated. OK, first of all, understatement is better. Second of all, the MPAA is full of crap. A naked woman is R because god forbid the children see that, but a pile of decapitated bodies? Thirteen year olds can see that, no problem.

No one was more surprised than I. Apparently it's Kristen Stewart, though. I'll blame Swype.

This. Was. Awesome. Alas, it's not on YouTube yet, but Jessica gets up to give a toast at Bella's wedding and it is hilarious. She basically says, "Bella was just an ordinary girl, totally head-over-heels for Edward like we all were, and then all of the sudden Edward was head-over-heels for her, like with zero transitional stages, and it doesn't even really make that much sense when you think about it." Cheap shot? Yes. Hilarious? You bet your movie seat.

God, you have to feel so sorry for Taylor Lautner. He is NOT ALLOWED to have a sweet scene with Bella, he has to grab her arm or force her to kiss him or yank her around. Because I was just about to tweet that Bella and Jacob have more chemistry than anyone else in the film, so OF COURSE it was very important for him to get very violent, because we can't have that, now can we. And of course it is very, very important that the Dark Skinned Boy be passionately violent and always twisting the girl's arm and forcing her to kiss him, and the Light Skinned Boy is calm and protective and Grown Up, and no there is nothing problematic about that at all OH WAIT THERE IS. *sigh*

This bugged me. As much as my Very Serious Post will be about people having strong opinions on things that are None Of Their Business, it still bugged me that 100% of Renee's presence in this film was w00t teen marriage is awesome. You'd think that if anyone would think that maybe this wasn't a world-beating idea, it might be her.

Billy Burke looks sad and long-suffering in everything he's in. I want a 2-hour movie with Billy Burke just looking sad and long-suffering. That would win Oscars.

Hey, if you're going to write a fantasy novel -- that's little-f fantasy, not big-F Fantasy -- you might as well go whole hog.

We're just going to leave all the doors and windows open constantly despite the fact that you, Bella, are human and you probably didn't have all your shots before you left because the vacation was all secret and stuff.

This is interesting. Bella has this incredibly tense moment when it's time for her to get naked. She even shaves her legs all over again and everything. And there's a part of you going why are you worrying so much, Edward worships every skin cell on your body but it's... realistic. And maybe that's part of Edward's appeal -- he's going to love her no matter what. So I guess that's kind of nice.

Oh, god, the sex scene. OK. They start having sex in the ocean (which is probably not very comfortable, but it's a fantasy so hush up brain) and then they have sex in the bedroom (where Edward breaks the headboard but they sort of laugh it off a little) and then Bella wakes up with a smile on her face. And the room is trashed, but it's trashed in a silly way, like there's no way that Edward had that far of a reach whilst the sex was happening, so it's not really a trigger thing. And then Edward storms in and points out that Bella has a very tiny bruise on her arm that looks like a hand print and another very tiny bruise on her shoulder.

And that's... kind of a problem. Bella does some serious staring and frowning at the bruises. But then she tells him that (a) they knew this would be tricky and (b) she thinks they're doing pretty well. But Edward is completely and totally lost in self-hatred and brooding, and OF COURSE Bella thinks it's because the sex was bad for him, or something. So they have this incredibly awkward conversation, and I am so frustrated with Edward because the whole thing is about how HE feels and what HE thinks, WHICH IS IMPORTANT, but it's not the ONLY important thing. It's 50% of the important, but according to Edward it's 100% of the important.

And then there's a montage of Bella and Edward on the island. And Edward keeps abandoning Bella because if he's near her too long, he'll be seduced, and that would be bad. Best. Honeymoon. Ever.

And now that Jessica has no reason to be in the movie, the job of movie trolling goes to Leah, who is Pure Gold and basically tells Jacob that he is Not Fun To Be Around. Ha.

And it turns out that there are People of Color on the island who are the Cullens' personal housekeepers. This is not problematic at all! And the Woman of Color is shocked to see Bella and worried for her safety because just because you take a job working for a family of blood-sucking vampires and clearly don't worry about your own health and safety doesn't mean you won't be worried for the pretty white girl.

I'm really so tired of "vomiting" and "late period" being Hollywood shorthand for "pregnant". I mean, there's a correlation, but sometimes you puke and have late periods because you've just had a stressful wedding with a stressful honeymoon full of stress because your new husband refuses to communicate with you about your needs. It happens.

Bella is pregnant with a never-before-heard-of vampire demon baby, so OF COURSE they should take her to a town she hates a stone's throw from the father she's hiding from because that's the only way Carlisle can help her! It's not like they have the money to ship Carlisle out to the Caribbean or wherever they are.

Oh my god this scene.

Edward has a phone conversation with Carlisle that is basically WTF VAMPIRE DEMON BABY? so then Edward goes and gets the Woman of Color housekeeper because "her people have legends, maybe she knows about this sort of thing." 


Because the Quileute having "legends" about the vampires wasn't enough, we are going to go get the housekeeper and say, "Excuse me, housekeeper, do you know anything about vampire demon babies? I ask because you have melanin in your skin and therefore have a rich background of legends-about-white-people to draw from."

This is the definition of defining people by their skin color: you are dark and therefore you have X cultural background. And your cultural background? It's mostly memorizing facts about white people. And maybe turning into wolves, if you're lucky.

Man, I regretted this tweet later, but yeah, for the moment, Bella's "difficult pregnancy" is largely conveyed by her wearing really heavy eyeshadow.

Forks is cold. And damp. And wet. And full of people who want to hurt Bella. And other people who would want to help Bella but need to know she's not nearby. So OF COURSE this is where she should be right now.

This scene. This scene. This scene.

How do I describe this scene? Jacob and the rest of the pack run all over the forest and swarm all over each other and attack each other and yell at each other and it is VERY VERY PROBLEMATIC. Because we just had a scene with a lot of white vampires calmly discussing their differences of opinion on the Bella-vampire-baby situation and everyone was very tense but civilized. And to counterpoint that, we will have a group of People of Color biting each other and yelling at each other and being incredibly passionate and animalistic and reactionary and violent and totally over-the-top AND NO ONE THOUGHT MAYBE THIS WASN'T THE BEST WAY TO FILM THIS SCENE. No one pointed out that having Very Calm White People Discuss X and then immediately cutting away to Very Violent Dark People Discuss X While Trying To Bite Each Other's Throats Out was a BAD IDEA.

Emmett whines that they haven't hunted in awhile. And they don't have backup blood in a freezer somewhere, natch, because it's not like there was a siege warfare on the Cullen house in the very last movie. You all deserve death for your stupidity and short-sightedness.

Jacob can't insult Bella because she's laid up with a bad case of preggers, so he's going to be INCREDIBLY CRUEL to Leah. For no adequate reason except that she's a girl, because he's pretty dang nice to her Annoying Little Brother.

Edward googles Vampire Demon Baby. Because that scene from Twilight set the world on fire.

Edward makes faces. Jacob makes faces. Bella makes faces. They are sad faces.

Bella phones Charlie to tell him that she's TOTALLY BETTER from being non-specifically sick, but that she can't go home because... uh... she's going to Switzerland! To a clinic! No, a spa! Serious! Billy Burke is sad.

Edward bonds with the child telepathically.

I continue to amuse me.

This bugged me. Like, the whole movie Esme had dark eyes. Does she not get special yellow contacts? Is she starving herself for some canonical reason?

There is a completely nonsensical scene with Esme in danger from werewolves. The vampires barely manage to get away by jumping over a cliff. Can they not climb trees and travel that way? They did in previous movies. It feels like fake suspense.

Ovegu fprar gvzr!

Urer ner gur certanapl gevttref: Oryyn ybbxf vapernfvatyl yvxr n fxryrgba bire gur pbhefr bs gur zbivr orpnhfr gur onol vf fgneivat ure. Naq gurer'f n fprar jvgu ure ybbxvat va gur zveebe ng ure fubhyqref naq fur ybbxf vaperqvoyl znyabhevfurq. Naq fur unf na VI va ure unaq sbe frireny fprarf naq gung uvg zr n yvggyr uneq -- vg'f abg cyrnfnag gb frr ure jnfgvat njnl yvxr gung.

Gura pbire lbhe rlrf nsgre Ebfnyvr gnyxf nobhg Erarrfzrr orvat n fvyyl anzr, orpnhfr gurer'f n PENPX naq Oryyn fbeg bs snyyf sbejneq naq gura jura fur fgnaqf fur'f fgnaqvat shaal naq V ernyvmrq ure fcvar unq pbzcyrgryl oebxra. Fur'f fgnaqvat ng n jrveq natyr naq vg'f abg tbbq ng nyy. Gura fur'f ylvat ba n gnoyr. Lbh frr Ebfnyvr tb va jvgu n fpnycry naq Oryyn fpernzf oybbql zheqre orpnhfr gurer'f ab narfgurgvp. Gura Rqjneq'f urnq obof qbja bhg bs gur pnzren naq gurer'f grnevat abvfrf, naq ur pbzrf hc jvgu n oybbq-fbnxrq onol. Naq rirelbar fzvyrf.

Gura Oryyn qvrf. (JGS RQJNEQ WHFG FGNAQVAT GURER JVGU ONOL JUVYR FUR OYRRQF BHG.) Naq ur gevrf gb erivir ure jvgu n arrqyr va gur urneg naq YBGF bs urneg-purfg-chzcvat. Naq gur jubyr juvyr gurer vf guvf uhtr oybbq-fgnva ba Oryyn'f noqbzra. Naq gura ur ovgrf ure, ohg gung cneg srryf n yvggyr nagv-pyvzngvp nsgre rirelguvat ryfr.

Gur oveguvat fprar gnxrf znlor... 5 zvahgrf? be 10? Vg jnf fvzhygnarbhfyl yrff naq zber onq guna V jnf rkcrpgvat, naq V'z abg fher ubj gb rkcynva gung. Oryyn'f fxryrgba snpvny rkcerffvbaf naq punccrq yvcf obgurerq zr zber guna gur npghny oveguvat qrgnvyf -- gurer jnf n ybg bs cnva penzzrq vagb ure snpr naq gung znqr vg zber erny guna gur oveguvat qrgnvyf V nyernql xarj nobhg va nqinapr. Vg'f bire cerggl snfg, ohg Oryyn qbrfa'g genafsbez vagb n inzcver sbe nabgure 10-20 zvahgrf bs zbivr gvzr. Znlor ybatre -- ure jnxvat nf n inzcver vf gur svany fprar.

And then the werewolves immediately back down from their war because Jacob has imprinted and Edward announces that it's their most absolute law. And he tells it to the Cullens and the viewers because Jacob is in wolf form, but it's frustrating to me that we don't hear the wolves talk about this and instead we must have the white people do the talking for them. And, no, a law that says you can't hurt an imprintee no matter what doesn't make them look totally animalistic all over again.

And then Bella turns into a vampire slowly, which basically means we watch while the camera lovingly airbrushes her away into a white marble statue. Literally, she stops having pores. And she opens her eyes and they're Vampire Red and ROLL CREDITS!

Psych! Actually, it's not over, because we get to see Italian Vampire Mob. And just in case you forgot they were evil, they kill their Human Secretary Woman because she spelled "Carlisle" wrong. Given that she's Italian and "Carlisle" is English, you'd think they'd be a little more understanding, but there's no better way to say EVIL in Hollywood-speak than to gratuitously 'fridge a woman.

And thank you all. This wouldn't have been fun without you.

(And I will totally answer more birthing scene questions if anyone wants clarification on how triggery it is/isn't. Since triggers vary for everyone.)


Bayley G said...

Does she say the fateful line "You're harshing my buzz?"

Because as someone who has suffered through painful sex with alarming regularity, that one line almost made me throw the book in the trash can. Literally, I walked over to the trash can and raised my arm before I stopped myself and instead tucked it into my bag to finish later. My fiancee egged me on to bin it, though XD

Ana Mardoll said...

She does not say that, but she does say, basically "I was happy until you started making this a big deal".

I really felt for her, I'll be honest. Edward deserves to have feelings, I'm not saying he doesn't. But framing it as "I am upset FOR YOU and YOU should be upset too" is not owning his feelings. If he's going to make it supposedly all about her, she should get a say in how she actually feels, imho.

Jonathan Pelikan said...

Here's the link to the Spoony One's review of BD. I didn't notice the request for linkage until now. It's long.

Amarie said...

Ana Mardoll…

You are hereby my Heroine For Life. I honestly just…I don’t…I can’t comprehend how you did it. *I* couldn’t have sat through Breaking Dawn (the last Twilight movie I trudged through was New Moon…and that was only because my mom was simply quite curious about the franchise). I knew I couldn’t bear to watch Eclipse because I would be even more annoyed than ever. And as for Breaking Dawn, well…

I know I shouldn’t keep bringing it up, but all of the Unfortunate Implications of Colored People would have been *screaming* at me while it was on the silver screen. I’m a firm believer that there’s a distinct difference between when something is *read* and when something is *seen*. I think it’s significantly harder to engage your ‘filtering system’ per say when you’re watching something. Hence the cognitive dissonance I think occurs in so many Twilight fans.

So, I just…yeah. : /

BUT! That is why you are my Heroine For Life! And when I come back from washing my BEAUTIFUL and DARK hair, I shall read the weekly Twilight Saturday post! :D

Izzy said...

The bruising thing...yeaaah.

So, okay, Holly Black did a pretty cool post--I disagree with bits of it, but agree with other bits--about kink and Twilight and how liking or not minding a bit of pain with sex isn't necessarily a bad thing, and teenage girls can be kinky too, and so forth.

And on the one hand, I am all for people being concerned about their partners, and consent, and people speaking up and saying no when things are painful.

On the other, possibly-TMI-ful hand...I am not a particularly kinky girl, certainly not by Intertron standards, but sex has occasionally left me with a bruise or three, it's more-than-occasionally left me, well, not really wanting to ride any bikes for a bit, ifyouknowwhatImean, and that's never been a bad thing for me. Sometimes things get rough; sometimes that's a good time; and I kind of enjoy bruises/soreness afterwards, the same way I enjoy being a bit stiff--heh--after a good workout. It's a "...yeah. Damn *straight*," kinda feeling.

Pun, er, not intended. Still.

Anyhow, I'm okay with Bella not worrying too much about the bruises as you describe them. And while a "Hey, I wasn't too rough, was I?" is always welcome, I would have very little patience with a guy who kept going on about how CLEARLY he'd done HORRIBLE THINGS and he was never going to trust himself around me EVER AGAIN OH WOE AND MORE WOE, after I'd said I was fine with it.

Like, "The door is that way, Bucky," little patience.

Ana Mardoll said...

BUT! That is why you are my Heroine For Life! And when I come back from washing my BEAUTIFUL and DARK hair, I shall read the weekly Twilight Saturday post! :D

I look forward to it! We've been missing your awesome comments. :D

Ana Mardoll said...

Yeah, I understand that it's MUCH WORSE in the book, but in the movie it's like the teeny tiniest little bruises ever. And on the wrist and shoulder, which are not particularly bad places to grip if you've got Vampire Strength and you need something to squeeze.

I'll try to duplicate the conversation:

Bella: We knew this would be hard. I think we're doing great!
*Edward frowns.*
Bella: Please can't you just see how perfectly happy I am? *smiles*
*Edward frowns.*
Bella: Or how perfectly happy I was. Now I'm kind of angry.
Edward: That's right. You SHOULD be angry.
Bella: I am, but not for the reasons you mean. I'm angry because you're over-reacting.

Pthalo said...

They start having sex in the ocean (which is probably not very comfortable, but it's a fantasy so hush up brain)

Just chiming in to give the TMI that it's not that it's uncomfortable to have sex when you're treading water and the water is like 10m deep, it's just a bit...hard to ... well you know.. stay connected to each other. Though it probably helps when one of you has a penis (neither of us did), and I've since been told that we were going about it completely wrong, and you're not supposed to swim out that far first, which makes no sense whatsoever unless you want to put on a public show.

Rikalous said...

I see Vampire Mafia isn't just Evil, they're Stupid Evil. The only villainy thing I can think of that's stupider than killing an employee for such a minor escape is putting the heroes in the Unnecessarily Slow Lowering Device and then leaving to go do something else on the assumption that everything will work out.

chris the cynic said...

That was, um, enlightening. I always assumed one would need to stop treading water to actually have sex, thus sinking, and making the whole thing basically impossible unless there was something in play beyond human beings and open water.

I've since been told that we were going about it completely wrong

There are rules?

JenL said...

Seriously. Maybe they explain this in the book, or something, but it Just Bugs Me. Rosalie and Emmett throw a wedding every 5-10 years. Presumably Edward and Bella will do the same, at least if they want to. (Ahahahaha, no, seriously, it'll be if ALICE wants to. I have Very Serious Thoughts on that.) So why so much drama around this particular wedding?
But! This is the FIRST one! Which means this is the one that makes it okay to have sex!
The rest of them for the rest of their very long un-lives will be for show and entertainment. But this one's so they can take the vows for realz. (In the sight of The Big Guy? What are the religious leanings of the family?)

Randomosity said...

Thanks for taking one for the team!

Cupcakedoll said...

"her people have legends, maybe she knows about this sort of thing."

With a bit more thought and a few more seconds of dialog that could've been, "Her people have legends, they've been vampire allies forever. Actually that's the reason we chose this island-- Emmett* was collecting the stories before they were lost." Let's have a historical reason for the 90% chance of useful legends!

*or whichever family member you can best imagine with a side interest in anthropology.

Makabit said...

1. I assume that Edward freaks out over the bruises because he's afraid of hurting her? (He's lucky he isn't married to me. I bruise if you look at me funny.)

2. I keep seeing the housekeeper as a big, practical-looking lady wearing a headscarf, looking sternly at Edward and telling him in a lilting Jamaican accent that everything she knows about vampires is from seeing that movie with Brad Pitt, and if he wants to know where baby vampires come from, he should ask his mother.

3. What is this weird language the whole section on the birth is in, and is it hard to learn?

Brandi said...

Huh, they were willing to go grislier with the birth scene than I thought (though I admit I, out of sheer meanness, wanted to see David Cronenberg brought in as a second-unit director for that part). The way many fans had reacted I thought they might do lots of Gory Discrection Shots (paradoxically, they probably had to for the C-section 'cause God forbid you might show genitalia instead of a nice socially acceptable geyser of blood).

Makabit said...

Intercourse in deep water is difficult because you have nothing to brace against but one another, and you do start to sink unless you can keep up a treading action together. Water wings help with this. What people most often do is go out deep enough that their bodies are mostly under, but they can still stand, and then they trust that everyone will just think they are making out in the surf.

Handjobs are much easier, and possible even in deep water. I'm told that oral is possible, if the subject floats, but is much easier on women, and also you have to be a good floater.

Makabit said...

Never mind, I figured out the glory of ROT13 on my own.

Kit Whitfield said...

I've been told that intercourse in water is also a bit risky because it can force water inside the vagina, which doesn't do it much good. Though that may be a myth. You'd think there'd be a problem with lubrication, though.

I suspect it's mostly to do with the symbolism of the sea.

And I'm with Izzy: bruises after sex aren't as bad as a partner who refuses to listen to his lady telling him how it was for her.

And welcome back, Amarie!

Pthalo said...

well, it goes kinda like *tread tread tread* *paddle towards other person* *fondle/kiss for a second or two* *waves push you apart* *tread tread tread* *paddle towards other person* *repeat*

There was a small buoy nearby, with a rope thing that we were also sort of trying to hold onto, but we still had to tread water and the gentle waves were pushing us apart, not together.

It was still fun, though, but fun in an "interesting swimming challenge" sort of way.


You're supposed to be able to touch the ground with your feet so that you can spend more of the time focused on sex and less on not drowning, but that simply isn't possible in the sea we were in, which gets deep rather quickly, not unless you want to put on a public show.

This is especially important if you're both women because if you need both your hands for treading water, and your need your head above water for breathing, and you don't have a strap on or anything like that, then there's not a lot you can do which resembles sex, even lesbian sex which has a laxer definition and doesn't require penetration to be sex. I still count what we did as being sex, and I even count it as good sex (because we had a lot of fun, and it was very interesting), but my definition of good sex is independent of orgasm, and I realise I'm in the minority on that view, so a lot of people probably wouldn't have found it good sex, not if they were needing to tread water.

It's best for the water to be deep enough to cover your waists, however.

It's easiest with at least one male participant, because most of the fun arises from the rhythm of the waves knocking you together while you stand there, connected. The waves supply the "in and out" motion. Or so I'm told, my experiences are limited to the treading water thing.

redcrow said...

Re: birth scene triggers - looks like there's also *this* to be wary of:

redcrow said...

(nothing triggery or squicky inside the link - just some warning about a possibility of epileptic seizures that can be caused by special effects)

chris the cynic said...

3. What is this weird language the whole section on the birth is in, and is it hard to learn?

I've actually wondered about the possibility of learning it because that would defeat the point. The whole point is that that's converted into Cthulhuesque gibberish so that you don't understand it unless you put it through a translator, but I wonder if it is the case that anyone ended up inadvertently getting the hang of it and thus it doesn't work for them.

Especially if you look at a bunch of shorter things it seems like someone somewhere might gain the ability to translate in their head without really trying. I go back and forth between thinking that possibility is absurd and thinking that it's completely reasonable and must have happened for someone by now.

Certainly glancing at the stuff in the main post I can immediately pick out Bella's name, but part of that is simply that I knew Bella's name would be mentioned.

Sailorsaturumon132000 said...

Please, a fan's question: do Volturi appear in Part 1 ?

Ana Mardoll said...

Only at the very end, for a quick teaser-hook into the next movie. They just sit in their thrones and talk ominously about wanting a certain something from the Cullens.

Gelliebean said...

Hopefully not TMI for anyone.... But the honeymoon part of Breaking Dawn (the book, not the movie, which I haven't seen) ended up being a part where I very much identified with Bella, for once. Absent the bruising/'for your own good' part. It was like "Wait, you keep me hanging for years, and now.... Just once? That's it?"

It's something that still causes hurt feelings, two years later, and hasn't gotten much better.

I guess that's not very contributory to the conversation, but I felt like I really needed to get it out there, just once. What Sparkleboi does to Bella there royally SUCKS to be on the receiving end of.

Ana Mardoll said...

I don't think it's TMI. I understand the feeling as well, and it's one reason why I'm biased to Bella on the issue. I'm just terribly frustrated that the sex has to always be on Edward's terms -- first, by going through a wedding she doesn't want, and then not at all because he feels guilty about 'hurting' her, even though she insists she's fine.

It's a tricky situation, because I don't think Edward should have sex he's not comfortable with. But I do think he needs to do more communication with Bella and be more open-minded to her point of view and stop dictating how everything is going to be.

What's the in-universe explanation for why they don't just vampire her and get on with the honeymoon? Excruciating three-day pain? Not that that's not a bad reason, you'd just think she'd go with it and get it over at that point, considering how Edward is being. But then we wouldn't have Reneesmee...

Will Wildman said...

you are dark and therefore you have X cultural background. And your cultural background? It's mostly memorizing facts about white people.

There are so many layers to this. First there is the sadness that this is in the movie, and then there is the hilarity at the way you've phrased it, and then there's the extra hilarity if I imagine this literally happening in the movie, and then there's again the depths of sadness that maybe it's not so far off the mark for PoC growing up in a culture that focuses on white people for its historical narrative to the exclusion of all others.

Seriously, though, it makes no sense. The Cullens should be able to keep house with 587% the efficiency of any normal human. They don't have housekeepers in Forks. Why are there gratuitous PoC servants here?!

chris the cynic said...

Why are there gratuitous PoC servants here?!

Seconding this question.

The Cullens, and sparkle-vampires in general, seem to be designed to have no need for servants. Almost everything where one might think, "I wish I had servants to do this," is something that either doesn't apply to the Cullens, or something that would be so effortless for the Cullens as to make the desire for a servant to do it seem superfluous.

Sparkle vampires are the only ones I can see pulling a Galt and not having it bite them.

Sparkle Vampire: Society has collapsed, the undeserving have all died off.
Reader: Ok genius, who is going to do all the work now?
Sparkle Vampire sneers.
Reader: Ohhh... Right. As a sparkle vampire you are actually so self sufficient as to be able to live comfortably in a life of luxury when everyone else is is dead. Never mind.
Sparkle Vampire chuckles.

Will Wildman said...

Oh blessed Buddha - how awesome could Atlas Shrugged be if the answer to "Who is John Galt?" was in fact "Dracula"?

Makabit said...

My impression, gleaned from bits her and there, was that they were not planning to 'vampire' her, but then because of the birth going wrong, Edward was forced to bite her in order to save her life.

If there was always an intention of her becoming a vampire, I'd say, maybe do it after the engagement party, and have her already nice and vampiric for the honeymoon.

Gelliebean said...

That crossover definitely needs to happen.... :-D

Ana Mardoll said...

I'm reminded of the movie Daybreakers ( ). Pretty much everyone is now a vampire, because obviously it's better to be a vampire, duh, but now they've severely over-farmed the animal population to the point where their community is not sustainable. It's sort of a Tragedy of the Commons situation, but with vampires.

Will Wildman said...

As soon as I wrote that, I began to think of Fred Clark's "Vampires and Crosses", in which he argues that the thing vampires really hate and fear about crosses isn't faith or divine magic, but the symbolic assertion that vampirism - feeding off others, narcissistic glorification, total independence - is wrong and empty, and true victory comes from unity and giving of yourself, even to the point of total self-sacrifice; that power will fail and the powerless will endure.

I'll put the concept on the list of Novels To Write After November. Gah, I have such a backlog. This is what comes of not writing for five years.

Makabit said...

I have to say, the only vampire novel I have ever really LOVED was Kim Newman's "Anno Dracula". Other than that, the genre has just never appealled a great deal.

I don't like zombie films either, except for "Shaun of the Dead". I'm so wrong for my generation.

chris the cynic said...

(This is just going by Ana's description, so if it's way off because of something I'm missing not having seen or read, sorry.)

Does anyone else feel like the process by which Bella was vampired is yet another example of her not having control over her own life? Bella wanted to be a vampire early on. She asked for it. Edward refused. He keeps on refusing no matter how threatened her life may become, no matter how much she may want it. He will not do it.

Until, finally, when she can no longer ask for it and is clinically dead and thus has no say in the matter and Edward finally decides that it's in his best interest (because he presumably doesn't want to be without Bella even if his actions seem to contradict that) it happens.

Bella, being dead, has no say in the matter and as far as we know Edward would have done the same thing if Bella had never expressed an interest in becoming a vampire. As near as I can tell it's the Cullens' standard operating procedure. Her thoughts are not taken into account at all, her feelings matter for nothing, instead it's presented in the form of a medical decision she has no part in.

Probably the most important decision in her life (it controls how her next thousand years will be spent), and she's not involved in making it. When she tried to make it she was shut down. Edward had total control and refused to make a decision on the matter until she was silenced by death.

Edward has say over what happens to Bella's body. If she gets to do with her body as she wishes it is only because Edward has decided it is best.

At least that's how I read the description.

Ana Mardoll said...

Chris, though I haven't read the book myself, I think that is incredibly insightful and ties very strongly in with my own feelings. (Hence my agreement, now that I come to think on it, but STILL. :D)

Makabit said...

I can't say that I think your interpretation is in any way wrong. All the power certainly lies in Edward's hands, and he appears to have acted up to this point with total disregard for Bella's preferences, and I assume he acts now because he does not want to give her up, and circumstances force his hand. I don't see any real reason to assume her earlier interest in being vamped plays into his decision, or more exactly, that her desire not to be would have changed his actions.

However, to play vampire's advocate, I can see why Edward might have resisted changing her over in the past. She's asking to die, which is something we're conditioned not to treat as a positive request normally. (I realize it may seem quite a bit different to him.) She's asking to die before she has a chance to get out of the emotional firestorm of adolescence, something Edward himself probably understands very well. And possibly, depending on how these particular vampires understand the whole vampire thing, she's maybe asking him to take on a level of intimacy, relatedness, and personal responsibility for her destiny that he may not feel ready for, no matter how in lurrrve he is. Also, not clear to me if they think it's got some impact on their spiritual standing. If Edward thinks he's damned for being a vampire, you can sort of see him not wanting to make another one. I don't know if that's a concept for these guys. I only know bits from my students, and here.

And his resolve lasts through quite a bit, but not the sight of her actually dying while giving birth to his child. That completely breaks his brain, to the point that all he thinks is 'hell no', and 'well, she wanted to be a vampire anyway, she'll be happy about this', and he goes fangs-deep before he can think about this too carefully, which he doesn't have time for anyway.

I can sort of see his perspective here.

Now, of course, I'm thinking of a short story I read many years ago, narrated by a vampire who's being stalked through a modern urban setting by a Gothy teenager who wants him to 'give her the Dark Gift'. She keeps waylaying him, and he keeps telling her to go away. The story ends with her realizing that he's gay, freaking out, and running off, snarling that she can't believe she wanted a gay vampire to bite her. The vampire's boyfriend--whose arrival caused all this--says something like 'who the heck was that'? and the vampire says, "Just don't ask."

Makabit said...

Ana, you've not read the whole series? A question--are you reading and analyzing as you go, or have you read a few books already?

Curious about how one deconstructs.

Ana Mardoll said...

You can do it from several directions, I think.

I watched Claymore before I deconstructed it.

I read Narnia several times over as a child, but am reading 1 whole book, deconstructing the book, and then moving on to the next, rather than re-reading the whole series.

With Twilight, I've only READ Twilight, but I've watched all the movies and I'm pretty de-spoiled. This was less an artistic 'deconstructionist' choice and more looking at over a thousand pages of Twilight Saganess and going... No. Just no. Not in one sitting.

The other big thing is I'm a firm believer that books should basically stand on their own, and it's no fair analyzing Twilight but me saying, "Well, this SEEMS odd, but in Book 15, Chapter 32, it's cleared up that..." No. That is a retcon. A welcome retcon maybe, but I'm not a believer in twelve dimensional chess. :P

Kit Whitfield said...

What's the in-universe explanation for why they don't just vampire her and get on with the honeymoon?

Something about her wanting to experience sex as a human first, I think. Or maybe him wanting her to experience it.

One must simply hope that vampire sex is better than human, otherwise the rest of her marriage is going to be a bit of a let-down.


you are dark and therefore you have X cultural background. And your cultural background? It's mostly memorizing facts about white people.

Thank you for summing up a distasteful implication so succinctly.

Thinking about it, it's not just memorising facts in this world. The werewolves are First Nations, right? But as long as there are no vampires around, they aren't werewolves; they're just people who get on with their lives and treat their lycanthropy as a cultural legend. It's only when vampires appear in the vicinity that they start getting their wolf on. (And am I right in thinking that imprinting is also part of this?)

Which is to say, if you're a brown person, your very existence - your mission in life, your romantic prospects, your body - are determined by the presence of absence of white people. You can only live your own life if white people stay out of your space; as soon as they come near you, your existence must revolve around them.

This could, in another context, be quite a good metaphor for the disruption racism causes to POC's lives: white people won't let you mind your own business, so you must become heroic to maintain even a relatively normal and dignified life. I have the feeling it won't play out this way in Twilight, though.

Gelliebean said...

Which is to say, if you're a brown person, your very existence - your mission in life, your romantic prospects, your body - are determined by the presence of absence of white people. You can only live your own life if white people stay out of your space; as soon as they come near you, your existence must revolve around them.

This.... has broken my mind. :-(

Ana Mardoll said...

And Will dug so much deeper, pointing out that POC often *are* expected to memorize facts about white people, at least how our U.S. history classes are structured. :(

I meant it as kind of a Twilight joke, but it really does apply to the larger world and that's so incredibly wrong. :(

Will Wildman said...

I meant it as kind of a Twilight joke, but it really does apply to the larger world and that's so incredibly wrong. :(

It totally works as a Twilight joke, and Twilight deserves to be mocked for it. I'm not clear on what the exact circumstances of the Gratuitous Housekeepers are - are they meant to be Americans flown in for some reason, or locals who live there all the time in case a Cullen wants to drop by, or what? In the Because Jasper (Studies Anthropology)* variant above, this could just be a temp job some of them take once in a while due to excellent pay from the Cullens, and they would otherwise have their own things going on with life and culture and economy, and vampire lore could legitimately just be something they know about. If they're getting flown in for special occasions from the US, then the most incredibly wrong interpretations are even more unavoidable.

*This is so wonderfully flexible. Because Jasper (Studies Anthropology). Because Jasper (Is A Kindergartener In The Play-Doh Of Your Emotions). Before the end of the first book I expect we'll find an inexplicable plot-vital event that we eventually determine can be justified with Because Jasper (Wanted A Sandwich).

Ana Mardoll said...

I *think* the movie was TRYING to introduce them as house-SITTERS, like "we don't like on Isle Esme all the time, so this nice local couple has been hired to watch over the house in our absence."

This doesn't really work, though, because the couple are clearly house-KEEPERS and they immediately start cleaning up the house and doing the linen and such. And house-sitter and house-keeper are really not synonymous.

As for why they might have vampire legends, I can hardly guess. It would seem to me that if Vampire = Extra White No Matter What Your Original Color Was, vampirism as a whole must be more "mainstream" in Europe, historically-speaking, where all you had to do was avoid sunlight, as oposed to in anywhere with People of Color, since it would be MUCH harder to hide. So if there's going to be "legends" of vampire-human hybrid babies, seems to me like Europe would be the place to start, not an island off the Americas.

But then again, that's not possible because white people don't have "legends" the way dark people always seem to. *eyeroll strain*

Rikalous said...

Maybe the housesitter/keeper folk come from a long line of Renfields. See, the legends Eddie mentions are due to their Renfield heritage and not their not-white heritage, and the Volturi don't care about them finding out because they know those families are trustworthy.

Crap. I just made people of color into hereditary servants of pasty white people in my attempt to rectify the fail. When the kewl superpowers have whiteness as a side effect, there's not a lot to work with.

Rikalous said...

There's also African vampires like the Adze and Asian vampires like the Jiang-Shi. Besides, in a world where vampires actually exist, you'd expect every group of people to have legends of them.

Rakka said...

White people are too sophisticated to have legends. I just puked in my mouth a little typing that...

I think it's very approriate that the rot13'd text looks like repeated headdesking, considering the subject.

cjmr said...

I think you pretty much just single-handedly guaranteed that I'm NEVER going to see this movie.

*looks around for brain bleach*

Charleen Merced said...

"It was not as horrible as I expected! (Behold the power of Low Expectations!) "

I thought the exact same thing. I went into that movie expecting the worst suckitude in the history of cinema. It wasn't as bad as I expected!

Ana Mardoll said...

It's amazing how often low expectations help. :)

OK, the mind-reading thing makes sense for why he knows to ask her, I guess. (Less for why she has the legends in the first place -- I still maintain that's a Race Fail in the source's world building.) But if that's the case, why does he have to ask her at all? Can't he just dig around in her brain without getting her all worked up? Maybe his telepathy doesn't work that way. o.O

Amarie said...

You know, the way I'm looking at is that Edward's telepathy working or not working is a metaphor for how a White Male of a White Family will have to communicate with others. That is, he is able to read the minds of those that are *insiders*; of course, those are the Cullens and, to a certain extent, other vampires. And their minds are ‘safe’ per say, because the harbor no outside/dangerous influence. But he is unable to read the minds of those that are *outsiders*; naturally, Bella would qualify for that, but we all know that little problem gets fixed wonderfully and magically. *winks*

Now…you have the housekeeper(s) as outsiders, of course. For starters, they have one of the biggest [former] Mormon no-no’s, which is dark skin. And, of course, people of dark skin are to simply exist as servants to their White Superiors*. What’s more is that they clearly (*snort*) have a multiple/different cultural views, rather than sticking to one. Therefore, Edward can’t communicate with/read them as he would an insider because, well…they’re outsiders. They are below him. It’s as though he were a Ph.D graduate being asked to read and re-read an overly simplistic children’s book, and/or that would be no different than reading a book on Satanism because their minds-like their skin-are so dirty and impure. A White Male must never touch such a dirty/stupidly simplistic thing if he is to maintain his status.

*I think this (people of color being in servitude) is a prevailing theme in Twilight, long before we even get to the housekeeper(s) and certainly after. First off…the wolves are mere servants because they, 1.) Only transform when several [white] vampires are around, and 2.) Solely exist as wolves for the purpose of protecting others from the [white] vampires. Laurent acts a servant in lieu of the fact that, in New Moon, he’s the first (I think) that warns Bella of Victoria’s return. What’s more is that his presence also introduces us to the werewolves and their abilities firsthand. Need I elaborate on the fact that Laurent fulfills this plot-filling duty by, well…being literally torn to shreds…?

And then there’s lovable, furry-old Jacob (sorry, Grover). I think he’s possibly the strongest example of a dark skinned character that fulfills the role of a servant. He…

1.) provides Bella with initial knowledge of the Cullen’s white vampirism, and thus ironically igniting the relationship that he is later so opposed to
2.) provides an emotional and dysfunctional crutch for Bella and (in an intense contradiction that only Twilight could achieve) keeps her safe while aiding her in perpetuating quasi-suicidal ventures
3.) acts as the ‘placeholder’/’second choice’ to Edward Cullen…which is to say that he relegates himself to ‘second best’, as is befitting of a dark skinned male contending against an Alpha White Male
4.) fully competes against Edward (in Eclipse) purely for the added show of female submission and objectification (fighting over Bella without giving her *any* say, among other things) and the supreme winning of the Alpha White male against the ‘mongrel’
5.) literally protects the Cullen’s and Bella from other outsiders (Sam’s pack) while Bella is pregnant with his child-to-be-groomed
6.) immediately takes on the role of Male Warden/Supervisor for Nessie’s virginity/sexuality as soon as she is born, thus liberating her biological parents from actually parenting

And I’m afraid that’s as good as I get at nearly 2 o’clock in the morning, haha. Gracious, I need to sleep for my studying and finals next week, but I dun wanna….>.<

Makabit said...

This is true. I was going to say, 'the KIND of vampires the Cullens are is a European legend', but truth to tell, they resemble very little about the actual vampire legends except for being immortal undead bloodsuckers.

And it would make sense that if they were real, everyone who had contact with them would talk about them.

Pthalo said...

I thought the way Edward's telepathy worked was that he only heard surface thoughts. So the woman saw Bella's pregnancy and thought fleetingly of the legends, but didn't think of them in infodump format (because who does, when thinking of things they already know about), so his interest was piqued and he asked, but had to ask in a way that didn't imply he was reading her mind.

That said, I like Amarie's theory better.

Charleen Merced said...

Because he can only hear what she is currently thinking, not go digging around. Her thoughts are probably like, omg hes a vampire, shes pregnant, like that time it happened ..... and a lot of dot dot dots. Hence why he asks. Plus, there is a language barrier. She is probably thinking half in Portuguese and half in her native tongue. So, he probably cant understand half of what she says.

And you can also look at the race issue another way. She always presents other cultures with much richer and evolved mythologies. These are the people that still remember, that still remember their elders and their traditions. Can you think of 1 regular "white" character in those books/movies that does that? Has she ascribed anyone else with such kind of deep cultural history?

Yes, the volturi have rich legends and cultural history but that is because they are old as hell.

Jessica, Mike, Angela and what's his name, all have very superficial and generic personalities. THe author barely cares about them. But, she spent a modicum of time exploring the Quilette tribe and made the culture prominent in the books.

@Amarie, Well, not quite. He can read everyone pretty well and fully except Bella and her father.

And...who else are they going to find in Brazil to work at cleaning the house but darker skin people?! It's Brazil! Even the whitest of them will have a tan.

Ana Mardoll said...

At least in the movie, she doesn't know Bella is pregnant until Edward goes and gets her and tells her. So either he's capable of diving down deeply enough to know she has legends and yet not deeply enough to process them fully or he's just assuming that dark people have legends.

"Positive Racism" is still racism, unfortunately. The idea that dark skinned people automatically have a culture and a heritage that defines them is still limiting. No one has ever expected me to know Celtic mythology or to live a life defined by ancient Celtic beliefs and practices just because I very much look the part. Bringing it closer to home, rarely am I even assumed to be a Christian, or at least not to my face in conversation. No one has ever said to me, "Ana, you're white. Can you tell me..." and then referenced some kind of Shared White History because most people see white people as individuals. Treating dark people as a hive mind of identical training and experiences is a serious problematic counterpoint to that.

If Meyer had included dark skinned city people in the Forks school by, say, making Jessica black, then we'd have a balance: there would be some dark people with 'culture' and legends and heritage and some dark people that don't have those things and are more mainstream Americans. As it is, there's a very sharp divide in Twilight between "normal American white people" and "exotic Native dark people" and this is a problem.

My first college roommate was one generation removed from otherwise being able to claim Native American heritage and go to college on a government scholarship. She played soccer, ate burgers, and I'm pretty sure knew almost nothing about her "cultural heritage" because it wasn't a huge issue with her (at least not in her teens when I knew her). In Meyer's world, though, she would have been a well-spring of information about werewolves and vampires because that's what darker people DO -- they memorize legends as fact from the moment they're born. It's insulting and two-dimensional.

As for the housekeeper thing, yes, the local people are dark. That is not the issue. The question is why the Cullens need to employ a housekeeper at all when they can take care of themselves by whipping around the house in Ludicrous Speed. The OTHER question is why it's a Very Big Deal to both Cullens and Volturi if a White Girl in Washington knows about vampires, but not a big deal at all if the Dark Woman housekeeping for the Cullens knows.

hapax said...

lovable, furry-old Jacob (sorry, Grover)

Sorry, my brain immediately went to that children's classic THERE'S A MONSTER AT THE END OF THIS BOOK -- except the final page would include a double-page spread of Taylor Lautner taking his shirt off.

[goes to make marketing pitch to CTW]

Ana Mardoll said...

Amarie, I feel like I never comment on your posts anymore because I'm not sure how to write *nods head in full agreement* over the internet, but I love this comment so much that I felt I needed to at least SAY so. :)

Ana Mardoll said...

"I love it! Print a million copies and get them out to Amazon by Saturday!"

Seriously, that's awesome. :D

Charleen Merced said...

@Ana Mardoll,

"The idea that dark skinned people automatically have a special culture and an ancient heritage that defines them is still limiting. "

Why? Although, I'd argue it doesn't define you, just adds to what you are.

Is there such a thing as a shared white history? No. There isn't even a shared Black or Asian history. There is a shared Hispanic History, or a African American shared history, and an Irish history. Just because you are dark skinned doesn't mean you have culture and legend and blah blah blah. But, if you are in a specific country, and there is a woman from a specific tribe that is thinking about vampires...well, there is something there. Note that he doesn't ask the other guy anything, who is also dark skinned. He only asks her.

You are generalizing too much in terms of race, I think you should generalize more in terms of culture and ethnicity in regards to the assumptions in this book.

"As for the housekeeper thing, yes, the local people are dark. That is not the issue. The question is why the Cullens need to employ a housekeeper at all when they can take care of themselves by whipping around the house in Ludicrous Speed. The OTHER question is why it's a Very Big Deal to both Cullens and Volturi if a White Girl in Washington knows about vampires, but not a big deal at all if the Dark Woman housekeeping for the Cullens knows."

These are 2 very good points. To answer 1, plot point, pure and simple. and the second one, plot point as well.

hapax said...

In Meyer's world, though, she would have been a well-spring of information about werewolves and vampires because that's what darker people DO -- they memorize legends as fact from the moment they're born. It's insulting and two-dimensional.

It's also darn close to the trope of Magical Negro. I'll just highlight this bit: the Magical Negro really seems to have no goal in life other than helping white people achieve their fullest potential.

Because Meyer does Not "always presents other cultures with much richer and evolved mythologies." She presents other cultures -- real cultures, mind you, with actual traditions and worldviews that she cannot be bothered to even Google -- with mythologies the she made up, solely to revolve around and serve the purposes of her whiter-than-white, richer-than-rich, protagonists.

That is an artistic choice. It's an *understandable* artistic choice, one that I've been known to reach for myself -- in my first drafts. It is also brimful of really vile Unexpressed Implications.

Ana Mardoll said...

I think there is a disconnect here of the Historian / Artist variety.

In my view, S. Meyer is not a historian. She didn't write this stuff down this way because that's the way it happened and she's sworn an oath to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. She had full control over what she wrote.

So when you say that it's a "plot point" that the Cullens have to have a dark skinned housekeeper who knows they are vampires despite this being previously established as a Very Big Deal, that's not an excuse for why it's not racist because it didn't have to be written that way. There are a million other ways they could have gotten the "information" that the vampire-baby is dangerous to Bella without having to tap into the cultural history of a local dark-skinned woman.

For that matter, there were many ways that Bella could have found out about the Cold Ones without having to tap into the cultural history of a local dark-skinned boy. There's a recurring theme in the series that when you need exotic magical history lessons, you grab the first dark-skinned person you see and interrogate them. That's not history; that's the work of the artist. And it's a problem.

As for why it's a problem that people assume that X Color Skin = Y Cultural Heritage, in addition to being insulting and degrading, it's had a resoundingly bad impact in the real world in many ways, including medicinal impact. There are cases where modern medical treatments haven't been offered to people who look Native American, because the white practitioner assumed the modern medicine would violate a religious belief and therefore didn't offer it. (I'll see if I can't dig up the reference where I read that recently.)

Tl;dr: Racism has real world consequences, even if it's "positive" racism.

You are generalizing too much in terms of race, I think you should generalize more in terms of culture and ethnicity in regards to the assumptions in this book.

Unfortunately, in Twilight, race and culture can't be separated because Meyer linked them so strongly. If someone is X Race, they have Y Culture, end of story. There aren't white people with legends and there aren't dark people with iPods. You've already noted that in your previous post.

Amarie said...

Charleen, ‘not quite’ back at you, darling. : )

I wasn’t talking about Edward’s [lack of] telepathy skills in a literal sense. Hence why I specifically put the word ‘metaphor’ in my post. And the metaphor that I was conveying was that, *yes* he may have the *ability* to read just about everyone’s mind, but there’s a recurring theme that he either doesn’t want to read the POC’s mind, or he is ‘fascinated’ by their minds. * Which heavily implies that they are ‘alien’ and/or ‘foreign’. Yet again, the text reinforces the theme that dark skinned people are outsiders that must be Dealt With In A Certain Way.

And I would argue that Edward talking outright to the housekeeper is really no different than when an American English speaker goes the Rush Hour (with Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan) route. Meaning, that they must ‘dumb down’ and talk loud, slowly and clearly because not speaking English is a sign of idiocy and mediocrity. And an Alpha White Male like Edward Cullen should be bothered as little as possible with trying to communicate with such low life-forms. So, he takes the easy and quick route by asking the housekeeper outright.

Ana is right; it *is* degrading, insulting and, frankly, quite childish and lazy writing. And, by Allah-Chupacabra-Taha-Aki-Great-Spirit, this little dark-skinned girl takes quite an offense to that.

*I also want to make a note of something that I missed in my last post. And that is that the werewolf pack is *literally* a hive mind. Could the disturbing and ignorant correlations be anymore blatant, I wonder…?

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