April Newsletter (2020)

The most surreal thing about writing this newsletter is going back to copy-pasta the March newsletter links and realizing just how much has changed in the past thirty days.

First: How is everyone doing? I desperately want everyone to be okay, or okay as possible, even while tormenting myself with the numbers and statistics flying around social media. I know a lot of you must be dealing with illness, unemployment, reduced income, increased expenses, and I want to reassure everyone that if you need to reduce/stop your Patreon pledge(s) then please do so. We do rely heavily on Patreon for our income, but your self-care is the most important thing here. You've got to secure your own oxygen mask.

Second: Kissmate and I are safe for the moment. Kissmate's workplace shut down temporarily but there's been no notice (yet) of layoffs or firings. My workplace has allowed me to work from home for a couple weeks, with emphasis on us "re-evaluating" the situation later. It means I worry a lot about being called and told to come in, but so far we've been able to self-quarantine for 3 weeks. We haven't gone outside (except for very brief, very careful grocery pick-ups) since Friday the 13th, which feels significant somehow.

We are living with a lot of fear and worry. Kissmate and I are both "high risk" groups for this virus, and many of our parents and loved ones are too. We haven't been able to see our loved ones for three weeks, surviving instead on calls and texts. Most of our loved ones have been unwilling or outright unable to quarantine, so that's been profoundly stressful. We've lost one friendship over this, from a friend who thought we were "over-reacting" to not allow visitors at this time. We're worried about the world at large. We're worried about when our jobs will lay us off. We're worried about a lot of things.

We're also relatively happy and I feel guilty about that. When the world is too much and we retreat to bed to cuddle each other and hug and try to turn our brains off with another episode of Great British Bake-Off, I think about how lucky we are that we're quarantined together and not alone. Kissmate's top surgery hasn't been cancelled (yet) and he's so excited about being able to "yeet the teets" as we've been saying. We're scared but safe in a bubble with a very fragile sort of happiness and it's got its own weird sort of survivor's guilt with it. "Why are we allowed to be safe when others are dying?" I wonder a lot.

Third: I injured myself this month while frosting a cake too vigorously. The spatula tried to fall off the counter, I twisted to catch it without thinking, and I tore an arm muscle. I'm fine in that Kissmate knows first aid and how to make a sling and kept me from making things worse by using the arm rather than resting it, but it means that between the pandemic and the fear and the not-working-arm, I don't have the Patreon post for you all that I wanted. I still want to get it to you, I was hoping to have it "late" this week like last time, but I don't think that's going to happen now. I just have to apologize and beg your patience. I'm sorry.

Fourth: If you contributed to Kissmate's surgery GoFundMe (either directly or through my Paypal), thank you so much. I still owe several of you physical books because we haven't dared go to the Post Office until quarantine ends. This is another thing I have to ask patience for, and I am so grateful to you all for being so kind to us. Kissmate and I have been so touched by the outpouring of support and it's meant especially a great deal given the lack of support we've received from family members. Found Family really is the best family.

Older Links

Index to Blog-Reads: Here.

YouTube Let's Plays: Here.

Tumblr Funnies: Here.

@DivorceKittens: Here.

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There will be more posts, just as soon as I can wrangle my brain into shape. I love you all, and thank you so much for sticking with us. Please stay safe out there.

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